Ass Angels 7

Title: Ass Angels 7
Studio: Adam & Eve
Director: Rosette Kalashnikov
Stars: Angelica Lane, Anna Nova, Annette Schwartz, Audrey Hollander, Brooke Haven, Heidi Mayne, Holly Wellin, Naudia Nyce, Ricki White, Tori Lane, Vanessa Lane, and Victoria Sin
Rating:

“Ass Angels 7” is a compilation of anal scenes previously produced in various other Adam & Eve films. The DVD runs for four hours with a total of twelve scenes, but out of those scenes only four can be counted as “quality” and worth watching.

Most of the scenes in the movie seem to have been made using either amateurs or low-ranking stars in the adult film world. It’s not fun or amusing to watch Victoria Sin get double-teamed by a guy who looks like a homeless man plucked from the streets, and his partner who is more than likely an 80’s hair-metal reject. Nor is it fair to be lied to by the enhanced images on the front cover of the movie, which make Heidi Mayne appear to be a blonde vision of sexy, when in reality she should sue her plastic surgeon for the horrible implant job he performed on her.

To make matters even stranger, or misleading, or unbelievable, the good scenes consist of a raw pecker that looks like a red rocket, an ass fucking in a morgue, a cheerleader, and some sort of half-angel half-nurse. I threw that last one in there not because the scene was good, but because the idea behind that costume is strange.

Tori Lane and Justin Magnum created the best scene; too bad it was the first scene, because three and a half hours later you’ve finished the movie and forgotten all it. Their scene is also the one with the red rocket. Justin literally fucks Tori till his dick turns red.

Naudia Nyce gives her convict ass-pussy to a prison guard in the morgue. It’s somewhat startling to see her bent over the metal examination table that only moments earlier could have held a corpse. I know it’s only a movie, but that’s the way my mind works.

And only four scenes into the film is when the last of the best scenes plays. It is of Vanessa Lane bending and posing in gymnastic brilliance, not to mention getting double penetrated as the scene progresses.

“Ass Angeles 7” has only to do with ass and not angels. And as we all know, asses can be dirty and dangerous places. The movie is not worth its price tag since it only offers mediocre actresses in a majority of mediocre scenes. I’d pass on this movie, and if it is any kind of reflection on Adam & Eve, since it is a compilation of that company’s scenes, I’d pass on Adam & Eve as well. For your money’s worth there are better studios offering a higher quality product in this particular niche who do more in half the time Adam & Eve has wasted here.